Savour and Cherish: A Daddy-Daughter Moment to Cherish

I have to remind myself every now and then of the purpose of this blog which is expressed in its name "Ippo-ippo" (step-by-step): We have to take every step in life with deliberation and mindfulness because, as the Zen teacher Thich Nhat Hanh reminds us, "Mindfulness is a source of happiness."

Related with this is a wonderful passage from Franciscan spiritual teacher Richard Rohr: 

Fearful, negative, hateful thoughts are like velcro; the neurons just grab around them and solidify. (My comment: That's why it's hard to let go of a grudge.) Positive, grateful and loving thoughts are like Teflon. They just slide off unless you savor them consciously (me: this is a major component of contemplation) for at least 15 seconds

For the full passage, see: Rohr on turning toward the good

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With that, let me resume this practice in this blog more regularly (since I'm on sabbatical!) and share something, a life "ippo" (Japnese, one step) today about one of my favorite topics - dad-daughter moments.

Our dear daughter KH is 10 years old. She's grown up to be a fine 10-year-old so far - respectful, having a fine sense of right and wrong, smart, athletic, musical ... She has far surpassed what I dreamed of in an ideal daughter. One thing that I really treasure and cherish though is our unique bond as dad and daughter. At this point in time, I can say, that KH and I are in a wonderful dad-daughter relationship - easy, friendly, affectionate, respectful. She can joke with me, tease me even, but I know that deep within she respects and loves me. When I am annoyed, hurt or even angry with her, she perceives that and seeks to address it swiftly for the better. The same is true of myself toward her, with her different moods. We can readily apologize to each other.

The other day, when I picked her up after her second choir concert (of that day), we were walking toward where the car was parked. She was in a happy mood and she was chatting away merrily as we walked. As we turned onto the street where the car was (it was a side street and at that time of the night [after nine], there were practically no other people around), she just naturally twirled her hand and arm into mine as she was chatting happily. 

KH doesn't really like public displays of affection but when we are by ourselves as a family, she is the sweetest young lady there could be! I don't exactly remember what she was saying but that moment of daughter-dad walking hand-in-hand, sharing the happy experiences of the day is something that really gave me such a deep and immense joy. My heart was just full to the brim. When your child is affectionate this way, doesn't it just melt your heart? 

I savour and cherish this "ippo" (one step)!

The Sublime and the Mundane - Planting lettuce and writing poetry

This is a delightful vignette from Buddhist master Thich Nhat Hanh that shows how life is connected with poetry, that the mundane and the sublime are like yin and yang, inseparable and necessary in order to live a life of depth that is squarely rooted in everyday realities.

One day in New York City, I met a Buddhist scholar and I told her about my practice of mindfulness in the vegetable garden. I enjoy growing lettuce, tomatoes, and other vegetables, and I like to spend time gardening every day. 

She said, "You shouldn't spend your time growing vegetables. You should spend more time writing poems. Your poems are so beautiful. Everyone can grow lettuce, but not everyone can write poems like you do."

I told her, "If I don't grow lettuce, I can't write poems."

(From Your True Home #103)

Of course, the quote in the image from the Sufi master Pir Vilayat Inayat Khan is also noteworthy.
I savor and cherish this teaching. A beautiful mosaic is composed of so many little yet uniquely wonderful pieces. Let's take care to make those little pieces count!